Getting Married in Ancient Hebrew Culture

Extracted text from AGK_Heb_Culture_Marriage.pptx:

Getting Married in the Ancient Hebrew culture:

Some challenges in conceptual associations and translation* Anne G Kompaore April 2019 A WordShare product**

*This presentation was inspired by challenges in translating Hosea 2:21-22. Versions of this presentation were given to a translation team in Pointe-Noire, Congo, Seed Company Bible Scholars Workshop at CABTAL in Yaound Sept 2017, Seed Company Bible Scholars Workshop in Abuja, Nigeria April, 2018, Francophone BT conference in Ouagadougou, July 2018, Rhema for the Nations, India Feb 2019, Jerusalem Center for Bible Translators in Israel April, 2019, and at a meeting for Translators Notes authors in April, 2019. **A WordShare product is a product that is designed for Bible translators and for anyone interested in knowing Gods Word better. Those using the product have the freedom to share it with anyone they wish provided that they do not sell it commercially and that they clearly indicate the names of its authors and contributors. This product may be adapted and translated into any language. Any comments and suggestions you may have are welcome. Anne Garber Kompaore agkompaore@gmail.com

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Marriage in the ancient Hebrew culture The way that people got married in ancient Israel was different from the modern Western way of getting married, but very similar to some traditional African cultures. When you finish learning about ancient Israelite marriages you can tell me how it compares to your own cultures.

The proposal is made The family of the young man approaches the family of the young woman, and proposes marriage. (Gen. 24, 34:48; Judges 14:210). Gen 34:8 Hamor said to them, My son Shechem has his heart set on your daughter. Please give (natan) her to him as his wife. (NIV) The marriage could be arranged, as in the case of Isaac and Rebecca (Gen 24), or the boy or girl could express the desire to marry a particular person out of love, as for example, Shechem for Dinah (Gen 34), or Samson, or Michal for David (1 Sam 18). In each case, however, the parents had to agree and make the arrangements.

The bride-price mohar If the young womans family agrees, then they give the bride-price. Hamors son Shechem said he was willing to pay any price, in order to marry Dinah: Gen 34:12 Make the price (mohar) for the bride and the gift I am to bring as great as you like, and Ill pay whatever you ask me. The bride-price (mohar) was not necessarily money or gifts. Jacob paid for he wives by serving his uncle Laban for 7 years for each one (Gen 29:16-30) Hamor paid by having his entire male population circumcised. (Gen 34:15) David paid for Michal, Sauls daughter, with 100 Philistine foreskins (1 Sa 18:25) Abrahams servant had beautiful jewelry, clothes, and precious gifts for the bride and her mother and brother. (Gen 24:53) Jacobs wives considered that their father had sold them to Jacob and spent all the money. For that reason, they were ready to leave their father, when Jacob wanted to return to the home of his father. (Gen 31:15)

The marriage contract 'eras piel When the bride-price was paid, the marriage contract between the two families was concluded. The act of making a marriage contract with a bride-price was called 'eras in Hebrew. When David ran away to hide from Saul, he had to leave his wife Michal behind. Saul took Michal and married her to another man. 1 Sam 25:44 However, during the civil war between Ishbosheth and David, Ishbosheths army commander, Abner, decided to make peace with David and persuade the rest of Israel to accept David as king. 2 Sa 3 When he made the proposal David, David gave one condition: he must get back his wife Michal. 2 Sa 3:13-14: 14 Give me my wife Michal, whom I 'eras-ed for a hundred foreskins of the Philistines. (See 1 Sa 18:25)

'eras how to interpret and translate 14 Give me my wife Michal, whom I 'eras-ed for a hundred foreskins of the Philistines. Let us consider the translations of various versions first: ESV : Give me my wife Michal, for whom I paid the bridal price of a hundred foreskins of the Philistines. NLT Give me back my wife Michal, for I bought her with the lives of 100 Philistines. CEV Give me back my wife Michal! I killed a hundred Philistines so I could marry her. TEV Give me back my wife Michal. I paid a hundred Philistine foreskins in order to marry her. NIV Give me my wife Michal, whom I betrothed to myself for the price of a hundred Philistine foreskins. (see also RSV) NRSV Give me my wife Michal, to whom I became engaged at the price of one hundred foreskins of the Philistines.

Does 'eras mean get engaged? NIV Give me my wife Michal, whom I betrothed to myself for the price of a hundred Philistine foreskins. NRSV Give me my wife Michal, to whom I became engaged at the price of one hundred foreskins of the Philistines.

Or does it mean to make a marriage contract i.e. marry? TEV Give me back my wife Michal. I paid a hundred Philistine foreskins in order to marry her ESV : Give me my wife Michal, for whom I paid the bridal price of a hundred foreskins of the Philistines In order to answer this question let us look a little closer at the meaning of 'eras.

Research of the Hebrew word in each context 11x in the Old Testament Exo 22.15 if a man seduces a virgin who is not eras-ed and lies with her, he must pay (bride price) her to him to be his wife Deut 20.7 Is there a man who has eras-ed a woman, but has not taken her? Deut 22.23 young virgin who is eras-ed to a man, and another man meets her in the city and lies with her... he... and she...must be stoned... also vss 25, 27, 28 Deut 28.30 (context - curse, sanctions) you will eras a woman, but another man will have sex (rape) her. 2 Sam 3.14 give my wife Michal whom I eras-ed to myself for 100 foreskins Hos 2.21, 22 I will eras you to me forever I will eras you to myself with righteousness...

Observations A virgin can be eras-ed to a man eras takes place before co-habitation and consummation of the marriage eras is distinguished from 'taking her' : what is the distinction? A bride price is associated with eras A woman who is eras-ed meets the same sanctions for infidelity as a woman who is living with her husband There is a bride-price (mohar) associated with 'eras. In Exodus 22:15, the process is re-ordered. If a man rapes a girl, he must pay the bride price after the act. In other words, he is obligated to marry her, unless the girls father refuses to allow the marriage.

Checking the dictionaries SDBH - to bind oneself with a promise to marry a woman; agent: human; goal: human - to betroth (old definition) ABDB - betroth -- Pi. (in Paratext) betroth (subj. man) obj. woman; followed by of price paid to father & of husband; of gift to bride & of husband, where fig. of Yahweh's covenant mercy to Israel. Pu. be betrothed

Word Biblical Commentary: "The verb (piel) refers to the ancient Israelite practice of settling the marriage contractually by the grooms payment of the bride-price to the brides father. This was the final step in the courtship process, virtually equivalent in legal status to the wedding ceremony. After the betrothal, cohabitation would follow at an arranged time. Several OT legal texts imply that a woman betrothed was as good as married in the eyes of the law (e.g., Deut 20:7; 22:2329; Exod 22:1617). Davids betrothal to Michal is equated in his speech to marriage (2 Sam 3:14; cf. 1 Sam 18:25)." Stuart, D. (2002). HoseaJonah (Vol. 31, p. 59). Dallas: Word, Incorporated

'eras and laqax - taking the woman to be his wife Deut 20.7 Is there a man who has eras-ed a woman, but has not taken (laqax-ed) her? Genesis 11:29 And Abram and Nahor took wives (lit. took woman) Genesis 34:4 So Shechem spoke to his father Hamor, saying, Get me this girl for my wife. (lit. take laqax this girl for me to be woman) Many more examples in Genesis for taking laqax a woman for oneself : Gen 4:19; 6:2; 11:29; 12:19; 20:3; 21:21; 24:3,4,7,38, 40, 67, etc. Therefore the process is: 1) Payment of bridal price mohar > 2) 'eras marriage contract > 3) take laqax the woman for oneself

So is there a marriage ceremony? In the European cultures today, there is an initial promise between the couple with permission from the families (engagement), and then there is a special wedding ceremony, where the couple exchange their vows before witnesses at the church and/or in the town hall. Afterwards there is a reception. The couple is considered married when the official declares them married (and papers are signed). Guests are expected to give gifts, but there is no price demanded between the families. In the ancient Hebrew culture, a marriage feast is not always mentioned. It is not mentioned at all in the story of Isaac, but we read of a week long wedding feast for Jacobs first wife, Leah, in which Leah is given to Jacob on the first night. Gen 29:19-30 Later in the Bible there are stories of wedding processions, where the bride is taken to her husbands house, and feasts. (Isa. 61:10; Judges 14:1011; Jer. 2:32; 7:34, 16:9, 25:10; Isa. 49:18; Ps. 45:815; Matt. 25:112)

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So what is the word for marry in Hebrew? Or we may ask the question when is a person considered married? The marriage process consists of concluding the marriage contract 'eras and then taking the woman laqax, which could take place immediately or at some later time. There is one final term that we need to consider before answering these questions:

baal - Deu 21:10When you go out to war against your enemies, and the Lordyour God gives them into your hand and you take them captive, 11and you see among the captives a beautiful woman, and you desire to take her to be your wife, ((laqax lekha leisha) lit. take her to yourself to be woman) (notice that there is no mention of bride-price or 'eras here) 12and you bring her home to your house, she shall shave her head and pare her nails. 13And she shall take off the clothes in which she was captured and shall remain in your house and lament her father and her mother a full month. After that you may go in to her (ba eleyah - enter to her expression for sexual union) and be her husband (baal lit. you shall master/husband her), and she shall be your wife. (lekha ishah - to you woman)

laqax and baal notice the variant translations in Deu 24.1 Deu 24:1When a man takes (laqax) a wife and marries (baal) her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce.... ESV, RSV, KJV 1If a man marries a woman..... NIV, TEV, NLT, NET A man takes a wife and possesses her. NJPS Suppose a man enters into marriage with a woman ...NRSV If a man has taken a woman in marriage ... REB Questions: What is the difference between taking a woman and baal her? Is baal the word for marry in Hebrew?

Can a man take laqax a woman and not baal her? Gen 20:2And Abraham said of Sarah his wife, She is my sister. And Abimelech king of Gerar sent and took (laqax) Sarah. 3 But God came to Abimelech in a dream by night and said to him, Behold, you are a dead man because of the woman whom you have taken (laqax), for she is a mans wife (beulat baal lit. husbanded of a husband). NIV she is a married woman; TEV she is already married 4Now Abimelech had not approached her ... See also Genesis 12:14-19 This is similar to the very rare situation where a couple are married but their marriage is not consummated. In that case, in Western culture (?), the marriage can be annulled.

baal nominal form The word baal has several meanings, depending on context:

1. master, head of household,
2. husband (master of the woman),
3. master of a particular skill (archer, speaker, horseman, etc.)
4. the name of the god Baal. The sense of husband can be found in the following verses: Gen 20:3; Ex 21:3; 21:22; Deut 22:22; Deut 24:4; 2 Sam 11:26; Est 1:17, 20; Prov 12:4; 31:11, 23, 28; Hosea 2:18; Joel 1:8.

So returning to the question: Does 'eras mean get engaged or get married? In studying the contexts of the word 'eras and laqax, we come to the conclusion that the word 'eras does not mean get engaged. In the Western culture, when someone gets engaged, a man and a woman promise to marry each other. It is preferable also that the parents also agree to the marriage. If, for some reason, the couple breaks up the engagement, or one of the persons is unfaithful to the other, there are no serious consequences aside from broken hearts. In the ancient Hebrew culture, if a young woman is 'eras, but has not yet been taken by her husband, she could be divorced by her husband (what Joseph was going to do to Mary when he found out she was pregnant), or stoned to death for adultery. (Deu 22:23)

'eras the definition So the act of 'eras is very close to the notion of getting married. That is why we can translate 2 Sam 3:14 like the TEV: TEV Give me back my wife Michal. I paid a hundred Philistine foreskins in order to marry her. It should not be translated engaged like the NRSV. This research inspired SDBH to revise their definition.

• 'eras - Proposed Definition verb pi; verb pu (passive) = , = action whereby a man makes a marriage contract by means of the payment of a bride-price with the family of a woman, which is usually done before the man takes the woman to live with him - make a marriage contract

In-laws and marriage: xatan Genesis 19:14 Heb: Lot went out to speak to his sons-in-law (xatan) the takers (lakax) of his daughters ESV ... his sons-in-law, who were to marry his daughters (RSV, NRSV) NIV ... his sons-in-law, who were pledged to marry his daughters NJPS... his sons-in-law, who had married his daughters (Darby) CEV .... the men who were engaged to his daughters TEV ... Then Lot went to the men that his daughters were going to marry NLT .... his daughters' fiancs Question: So are these daughters married or not? We see in verse 8 that his daughters were still virgins, and still living with their parents.

UBS Handbook for Genesis These young men are called sons-in-law as in verse 12. rsv describes them as who were to marry his daughters. The Hebrew text has a participle meaning the takers of his daughters. Apparently some form of betrothal or mutual promise had taken place to mark them as future husbands, and in Hebrew society such couples were already considered husband and wife before they began to live together. Some translations like kjv have which married his daughters, while others like tev have his daughters were going to marry, referring to the future. Septuagint has the past (like NJPS) and Vulgate the future. (like ESV and TEV)

UBS Handbook advice Assuming that Lot has only the two virgin daughters mentioned in verse 8, it is best to consider these young men as future sons-in-law: they have not yet taken Lots daughters as their wives. But then they add: In other languages and cultures this may be expressed in the terms that are appropriate for engagement and marriage. In some languages, for instance, the terms promised and marked are used for both males and females who are formally engaged; in other languages the actual terms for son-in-law and daughter-in-law are used from the time of engagement.

Cultural concepts in conflict When the text talks of xatan of Loth - his in-laws, related to each other by marriage this implies that the marriage contract has already been concluded ('eras). Only the girls are not yet taken. But we have already seen that it is not exactly equivalent to the western notion of engagement. For the Western languages, the translation is difficult because without marriage there are no in-laws, and if there are virgin girls at home, that means they are not yet married, so they think of in-laws as being a future state for Lots family. But for the Hebrew mind, the girls are not just promised, they already belong to the men. And the men are Lots sons-in-law.

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The French UBS manual According the French UBS manual, there are some interpreters who thought that Loth must have had 4 daughters two unmarried daughters at home, and 2 married daughters living with their husband. In their western culture, a man cannot have a son-in-law if his daughters are still at home. According to the TN manual for Genesis

Barnwell, K., Kuhn, H., & Neeley, L. (2014). . Dallas: SIL International. Barnwell, K., Kuhn, H., & Neeley, L. (2014). Translators Notes 27

TN Manual for Genesis The Hebrew phrase that the NIV translates as who were pledged to marry his daughters is literally the takers of his daughters. Here it means that the men had promised to marry Lots daughters. The Hebrews considered this promise an important part of the marriage contract.663 In some languages a term like sons-in-law may not be used until after the actual marriage. The NJB uses the phrase future sons-in-law. Use an appropriate term in your language. 663 NLT, NIV, TEV, CEV, RSV, NASB, NET, GW, NJB, and NCV express this view. However, the Hebrew expression is ambiguous. Some versions take it to mean that the men had already married Lots daughters. (See LXX, REB, NJPS, and the NIV margin). That view would imply that these two daughters were different from the two virgin daughters mentioned in 19:8.

Barnwell, K., Kuhn, H., & Neeley, L. (2014). Translators Notes On Genesis: Notes (Ge 19:14). Dallas: SIL International.

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X..T..N - a look at the verb and the noun xatan vb the act of marrying between families; nominalized in-law, son-in-law, father-in-law in Gen 34:8, i.e. the act of becoming in-laws with one another in marriage; Deut 7:3; Jos 23:12 forbidden to be allied in marriage with other peoples; 1 Kings 3:1 Solomon is allied in marriage to the king of Egypt. xoten nm father-in-law Exo 3:1 (Jethro, father-in-law of Moses); mother-in-law Deut 27:23; Judg 19:4 xatan nm son-in-law, in-law, groom (newly married man) Gen 19:12, 14; Ex 4:25; Jug 15:6; 1 Sam 18:21; 22:14, etc.

David and his wife Michal 1 Sam 18, 2 Sam 3 18:20 Michal is in love with David, the brave warrior who killed Goliath 18:21 Saul proposes to give Michal to David. David would become Sauls in-law (xatan) 18:22-23 He finds a way to convince David to become his xatan. David says that he is too poor. Implied to pay the bride-price (mohar). 18:25 Sauls response: he tells David what he must do to marry his daughter 100 Philistine foreskins 18:26 The answer satisfies David: He was pleased to become Sauls xatan

mohar (bride-price) > eras > xatan (in-law) > natan (give) 18:27 David brings the 100 forskins (as a kind of bride-price in order to become Sauls xatan. Then Saul gave David his daughter Michal to woman. i.e. to be his wife. See also 1 Sam 25:40-44 2 Sam 3:14 Give my wife Michal, whom I 'eras-ed to myself for 100 Philistine foreskins.

In the traditional Mossi culture, Burkina Faso Pupusem was originally the conclusion of the marriage agreement. It was a ceremony between two families where the conditions for marriage were agreed upon, and the bride price was paid. After the ceremony, the wife was accompanied to her husband's house (equivalent to the man taking his wife in Hebrew). Nowadays in Christian circles, the pupusem takes place some time before the wedding ceremony. It is considered to be an engagement ceremony. However, the pupusem is considered so binding for the woman that she is allowed to have only one pupusem in her entire life. If for some reason there is a break up before she moves to her husbands house, and she goes on to marry someone else, she cannot have another pupusem ceremony.

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Comparison of Marriage concepts between cultures Hebrew Old Testament eras marriage contract with bride-price (mohar) between families; contract concluded before the woman goes to live with her husband. a woman who is eras*, even if she is not yet living with her husband, can be divorced or stoned to death for adultery. xatan son-in-law, father-in-law, once the woman has been eras-ed a wedding feast (and procession) natan the act of giving the woman in marriage laqax the act of taking a woman that one has eras-ed to live together baal - consummation of the marriage, married life Modern Western (Europe, America): be engaged Promise to marry. Permission from parents (optional) break-up of engagement can be initiated by either side. Without any judicial consequences. wedding day the father gives the daughter in marriage; contract signed at the town hall/church; vows exchanged in the presence of witnesses; they are declared man and wife married; wedding reception; the couple leaves together in-laws families allied in marriage consummation of the marriage married life

• In modern Hebrew, I have been informed that the word eras is used to refer to the modern notion of engagement. However, the more orthodox Jews still do arrange marriages between families. 33

Bibliography Barnwell, K., Kuhn, H., & Neeley, L. (2014). Translators Notes On Genesis: Notes. Dallas: SIL International. Reyburn, W. D., & Fry, E. M. (1998). A handbook on Genesis. New York: United Bible Societies. Reyburn, W. D., Fry, E. M., & Pter-Contesse, R. (2005). La Gense: Commentaire linguistique et exgtique de la Bible. Villiers-le-Bel, France: Alliance biblique universelle. Singer, I. (Ed.). (19011906). In The Jewish Encyclopedia: A Descriptive Record of the History, Religion, Literature, and Customs of the Jewish People from the Earliest Times to the Present Day, 12 Volumes (Vol. 8, p. 337). New York; London: Funk & Wagnalls. In (Vol. 8, p. 337). Stuart, D. (2002). HoseaJonah (Vol. 31, p. 59). Dallas: Word, Incorporated.

Appendix

The Betrothal (from the Jewish Encyclopedia) The first step toward marriage was betrothal, involving the consent of the parent or guardian of the girl and the payment of a price. The act of betrothal is expressed by the Hebrew word aras; the price paid, by mohar (see Gen. 34:12; Ex. 22:1617; Deut. 22:7, 22:29; Hos. 2:1920). The mohar may be in the form of service in the field or in war (Gen. 29; 1 Sam. 18:25). Probably it was customary, even in early times, to give the bride some portion of the mohar, or at least to give her presents (Gen. 24:53, 31:15, 34:12). After betrothal the bride might be taken to her husbands house and the nuptials celebrated either immediately or later (Gen. 24:4967; Judges 14:5 et seq.). The initial steps, it appears, were customarily taken by the parents of the suitor, who formally made the proposal (Gen. 24, 34:46; Judges 14:210). Not infrequently, however, in the comparatively free social intercourse of those days, the young man and woman had met and formed a mutual attachment resulting in a love-match (Gen. 29:912, 18; 1 Sam. 18:2028). Singer, I. (Ed.). (19011906). In The Jewish Encyclopedia: A Descriptive Record of the History, Religion, Literature, and Customs of the Jewish People from the Earliest Times to the Present Day, 12 Volumes (Vol. 8, p. 337). New York; London: Funk & Wagnalls. In (Vol. 8, p. 337).

Marriage ceremony (from the Jewish Encyclopedia) After betrothal the bride was subject to the same restrictions as a wife (Deut. 22:2324). Of the marriage ceremonial little is known; it is not mentioned at all in the story of Isaac, while in that of Jacob (Gen. 29) a marriage-feast and a nuptial week are spoken of. The central features in later times were the wedding-procession and the wedding-feast. The bridegroom in festive attire and accompanied by his friends went to the home of the bride, whence she, likewise in bridal garments, veiled, and accompanied by her companions, was led to the house of his parents (Isa. 61:10; Judges 14:1011; Jer. 2:32; Isa. 49:18; Ps. 45:815). The procession was enlivened with songs by, or in praise of, the bride and bridegroom, and was lighted, if in the evening, by torches or lamps (Jer. 7:34, 16:9, 25:10; 1 Macc. 9:3739; Matt. 25:112; comp. Ps. 45 and the Canticles, possibly representing such wedding-songs). There followed the nuptial feast in the house of the bridegroom, and the sub-sequent festivities sometimes continued for several days (Matt. 9:15, 22:114; John 2:1). Singer, I. (Ed.). (19011906). In The Jewish Encyclopedia: A Descriptive Record of the History, Religion, Literature, and Customs of the Jewish People from the Earliest Times to the Present Day, 12 Volumes (Vol. 8, p. 337). New York; London: Funk & Wagnalls. In (Vol. 8, p. 337).

Isaac and Rebecca: Genesis 24 Arranged between families Marriage agreement/contract with the Isaacs family giving gifts to Rebeccas family Next day Rebecca leaves to join her husband, but only with the permission of her parents. Wedding feast? Not mentioned When Rebecca arrives, Isaac takes Rebecca, and she becomes his wife 24:67.

Sarah and Pharaoh: Genesis 12:15-19 15And when the princes of Pharaoh saw her, they praised her to Pharaoh. And the woman was taken (laqax) into Pharaohs house. 16And for her sake he dealt well with Abram; and he had sheep, oxen, male donkeys, male servants, female servants, female donkeys, and camels.(bride-price) 17But the Lordafflicted Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai, Abrams wife (ishet Abram). 18So Pharaoh called Abram and said, What is this you have done to me? Why did you not tell me that she was your wife (ishetekha)? 19Why did you say, She is my sister, so that I took her for my wife (latax otah li leishah)? Now then, here is your wife; take (laqax) her, and go. 20And Pharaoh gave men orders concerning him, and they sent him away with his wife and all that he had. (ESV)

Jacob and Leah and Rachel: Genesis 29 Jacob proposes to Laban Proposal accepted - Marriage contract (bride-price 7 years of work) Jacob claims his wife - 21Then Jacob said to Laban, Give (yahab) me my wife that I may go in to her, for my time is completed. (payment is complete) 22 The festivity begins (mishteh) 23 Leah is given to Jacob the first night. The marriage is consummated The wedding feast lasts 7 days. 28 Jacob agrees to another 7 years work for Rachel Rachel is given to Jacob at the end of the 7 day wedding feast See also Gen 31:15 the wives concept of the marriage contract! Are we not regarded by him as foreigners? For he has sold us, and he has indeed devoured our money. (ESV)

Samson and his bride from Timna: Judges 14-15 14:1 Samson sees a Philistine young woman at Timna. 2 He asks his father to take (laqax) the young woman to be his wife 5 Samsons father goes to Timna to make the proposal on behalf of Samson (24:5,10). Samson also talked to her by did not take her at that time (24:7) 8 Samson goes back to Timna in order to take (laqax) the young woman 10 Samson prepares a wedding feast for 7 days, and gives a riddle 15 On the fourthday they said to Samsons wife (ishah), Entice your husband (ish) to tell us what the riddle is... 19 A quarrel erupts and Samson goes back home very angry and without his wife.

Samson, ctd 14:20; 15:2 The family gives their daughter, Samsons wife to another man. They think that Samson no longer wants their daughter. 15:1-2 Later Samson goes to visit his wife at her fathers home. He brings a gift. The father des not let him go into her room, because she was given to another man. They suggest that he take (laqax) her younger sister instead. Samson takes vengeance because his wife was given to another man; he was the legitimate husband. 15:6 Then the Philistines said, Who has done this? And they said, Samson, the son-in-law (xatan) of the Timnite, because he has taken his wife and given her to his companion. (ESV)